(via m0rtality)
(via banfred)
Humble Beginnings — Help Ink
(Source: thecircle-, via amimorethanyourebloggingforyet)
Despite their slipping ratings, train wreck Garden State reality shows slog on. To ease our suffering, Rich Juzwiak dreamed up a few highly specific ways the world could be rid of Jersey-centric reality TV. For example:
JERSEY SHORE
MTV, Thursdays, 10 p.m. Eastern, 9 Central
Having rubbed their genitals numb a while ago, no one in the cast notices when a small friction fire breaks out during an orgy involving everyone except for Ronnie and Sami, who are crying in another room. Because the orgy room is, like the rest of the house, strewn with synthetic hair, polyester bras and sawdust, the fire is able to travel quickly to Snooki’s dresser, which contains two dozen cans of aerosol hairspray. The house explodes. No one is killed, but they’re singed to the perma-tans to which they’ve always aspired. Everyone retires as one big happy family.
(via ghostnotebusters)